Clarkys Comments – Rd 5 Legends Match Report


There’s a theory out there… of a parallel world, a duplicate of Earth on the other side of the sun. Its exactly our like our Earth except that everything is opposite. A doppelgänger planet. If your were left handed here, then your right handed there. An Earth where politicians were honest, teachers respected, kids did what they were told and Richmond still finish 9th coz thats half way in the ladder.
I think I was there on Sunday.

The legends took on the old foe, Craigieburn out at Craigieburn. It’s a long way from home Toto and most of don’t travel that far for holidays.
As I set off on the voyage through the urban sprawl, things changed.This when everything was odd.  Entering the deep space co-ordinates for Craigieburn (which is somewhere near the Romulan neutral zone) into the Google maps machine, something was odd. Little Miss Googles was a bloke. A bloke voice. Odd. Now blokes don’t like being told how to drive by another bloke, thats the job of all women everywhere as we all know. What the hell was Google thinking? Odd.
The trip to Crazyburn was delightful. Odd. Upon turning off the blokey-bloke-bloke Google map boy, I didn’t get lost. Odd. On arrival, the weather was perfect. Sunny skies, no clouds, no rain, no hail, no sleet, no snow. Odd. Terry was wearing Bermuda shorts. Not odd, whilst highlighting his perfectly shaved legs. Odd. Kevin (who is now just odd) revealed that he was free-balling today and has done in every match since 2009. Odd

We stormed ground, and having salulated Robbie Crivs 50th game, hit the lead early. Odd. Big Col dominated the ruck as we blazed away at goal registering 5 points and a few majors. 2 goal lead at quarter time. Odd. Kevin fell down, legs in the air and cleared the stadium. Children cried, as their mothers shielded their eyes from the horror. Big Col was developing a real relationship with the umpire, but doubtful he’ll  be putting him on his Christmas card list anytime soon. Half time saw Craigieburn narrow the gap as we went in with a slender lead. Still, our tackling was solid, our handball brilliant and the sense of teamwork was overwhelming. Third quarter and we nailed it. Odd. Great passages of play, lots of talk and support gave us goal after goal. Knuckles was at his gleaming best. Not odd. Tug dropped every mark he was presented with. Odd. Mick Lindridge owned the centre with great support from Robbie, Rossco and Caino. With a 5 goal lead at the last break, hopes were high. Odd. Final quarter, saw Dynesy dominate in the backline and the ever reliable Lenny run his heart out. None of that odd. Fluff got crunched as he went for a contested ball, odd (not that he got crunched, but that  he went for a contested ball. Sorry Tony), but it showed the desperation we had for a win. History only remembers the winners.
Everyone did their job and with a fast finishing Craigieburn narrowing the lead, the Raiders held them off and it was a sweet victory. Odd

Raiders 9.6 Def Craigieburn 7.3

Best for the Raiders apart from everyone was Big Col Fewster, Mick L, Robbie (50) Criv, Knuckles, Dynesy, Cain, Rossco
Goals to Rossco, Tug and Robbie, Baz (2) and Knuckles with 1
The choclates went to Big Col
Injuries were to the Gooch’s beautifully manscaped hamstring and the innocence of 36 junior footballers who saw Kevins wobbly bits.



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